As most of you know I began this blog as a way of documenting my design business, family joys and other fluffy, fun things. But today is Good Friday and my thoughts have turned to true matters of the heart. This is My Testimony A Heart Decorated for Easter.
My Testimony A Heart Decorated for Easter
From time to time I have given glimpses into my life and childhood. It’s not anything that I keep secret. I share my story with anyone that it might benefit. I remember my past, but I refuse to ever let it determine my future.
Because I primarily write fun, fluffy stuff people often assume that I grew up in the Cleaver household and that I too now vacuum while wearing pearls. But my beginnings are much more humble than that and there is only one reason why I am sitting here writing this post today.
The sad facts are this: my parents were occasional drug users. My dad was a high school dropout who spent time in jail. He became involved in a gang that ultimately killed him. My mother was pregnant with me at the time. Sadly, she passed away from a brain tumor when I was 5 years old. I had two sets of healthy grandparents but for various reasons, I ended up being raised under the umbrella of the California foster care system.
Too Much Pain
By the time I was 16 I had experienced more pain and disappointment than any one person should have to endure in their lifetime. More than one person was ready to write me off. I was ready to write myself off.
In the still contemplation of such awful thoughts, I heard a voice. It was very quiet, but it clearly spoke to me. “You are not alone. I am here.” In my heart of hearts, to the very depths of my soul, I knew who the voice belonged to.
I Am Not Alone
There was an acceptance that Jesus was there for me and with me. That He would never leave me. That somehow He loved me and believed in me even when no one else did. I was not insignificant, I mattered.
Did my life become all sunshine and roses after I accepted Jesus? Since that day I have experienced tremendous joy. But there has also been sorrow.
I have often not made the wisest choices and at times life was and is very difficult. I was involved in an ill-suited marriage, had my daughter when I was only 20, and consequently dropped out of college.
Yet time and again Jesus has shown me mercy and grace. Through horrible illness, the death of loved ones, infertility, miscarriage, and other trials, I knew that I would be ok because nothing is stronger than Him.
He Is There
He has been there with me through it all. A recent trial came in the way life often does, full circle. I learned that my grandfather had Alzheimer’s and needed someone to care for him. It’s hard to admit that I struggled with this. I didn’t want to watch my grandfather slip away. The small, selfish part of me wanted to say “Why should I care for him? He wasn’t there when I was 5 years old and needed a home.”
But the Spirit led me to do what was right. Because of this, I learned about the wonderful man my grandfather really was and why he had made certain life-altering decisions. I learned that regret is just a useless tool that will never help you in your future. I learned patience and that the heart has a limitless capacity to love. It was possible for me to learn this because of one Man.
Jesus possesses the purest and most beautifully decorated heart, and He loves you. When He walked this earth He loved the people many considered unlovable. You may not know him, but He knows you.
He knows your ugliness and your truth and it doesn’t matter. So much so that He suffered an agonizing death on the cross. All because of His love for you.
You are not alone.
I too am here for you.
Laura
Good and bad choices are what makes us human. It appears that you are an amazing woman, touching the lives of many. You don’t know me, but through your blog you have brought me joy. Happy Easter.Lisa
Thank you for sharing your past experiences and how God has made it possible for you to lean on him. I’ve been reading your blog for quite some time and I would have guessed you were raised by the Cleavers.Wishing you a very blessed Easter.
How beautiful and oh so true. I pray that each person out there may have Jesus be as real to you and me. I saw your note on Jill’s Sew a Fine Seam and had to check you out. Can’t wait to catch up on some older posts. Live boldly for Christ!
Laura, MANY hugs to you, a blessed Easter, and NO, you are never alone ♥♥
Laura! Thank you for sharing that! Tears are rolling down my cheeks. I agree… Jesus is always there for us…no matter what. In our darkest times he’s there all the more… It’s so beautiful that he spoke to you and let you know you weren’t alone. You have a such a great heart and an inspiring story.God bless you, Sister! Have a joyful and blessed Easter weekend!
This poat makes me think of moments of divine inspiration, one in particular very similar to one you describe, when God’s voice kept me alive. I think God is always talking, but we often, rarely, never? hear. I appreciate a connection like the one you are giving here to your history, in such an otherwise anonymous venue. Thank you dear girl of quiet strength.
Laura, this is beautiful. I struggle with how to tell people about my Savior and how their life will never be the same if they will get to know him; you’ve said it so eloquently. When it is all said and done, God is so good.
Amen!! What a wonderful post. Everything and everyone has a purpose in God’s plan even though we don’t always know what it is and why things happen. Like you said we just need to trust in Jesus and what he did for us because he loves us. Thank you for sharing your story. Hugs and blessings and Happy Easter to you. Jenn
Happy Easter Laura — I was very touched by your blog today– you inspire and your story was very touching. I want to share that I have found a blog called http://bloggerspirit.blogspot.com/ and your blog today would go great with the blogs that are shared on this site! Just an idea! God Bless you and your family in this Holy Season! Blessings- Karyl(Carol)
Thanks for sharing your testimoney Laura. I don’t believe that any of us really have June Cleaver lives. Each of us, if willing, can be molded by the Lord to be what He wants us to be. I am so thankful for Jesus in my life, and thankful to know your story with Him also. Have a blessed Easter!
THANK YOU FOR SHARING SUCH A PERSONAL STORY THAT I’M SURE WILL BRING SOMEONE CLOSER TO JESUS.HUGS FROM MAINE
Laura,I was touched by your life story, and know its message will help someone struggling today. I wish you all my best and you will be in my thoughts and prayers. Happy Easter….~Cathy~
Thank you for sharing such a heartwrenching story and a beautiful testimony of Christ’s love.Happy Easter!
What a beautiful and touching post. I think you said it so eloquently. Jesus is the answer. Have a Blessed Easter and I wish you the best.
Thank you Laura for sharing. I think that there is an illusion out there sometimes that everyone has a perfect life except us, because we know our own details.It is always uplifting to hear the story of someone who has been lifted to a better place by faith in the Lord and His Atonement. Each day that we do our best to become better, to become more like Him pleases Him and makes His sacrifice worth it. This week one of our missionaries was arrested at the airport, noone knew that his visa had expired. I went to see him yesterday and after inquiring about his mother, he was pleased to tell me that he was teaching one of the other prisoners about the Savior. The prisoner commented that if he hadn’t been in jail he couldn’t have taught him. Total trust in the Lord and His plan. I was in the presence of greatness. When I reported to his mother, she said how proud she was that her son was not thinking of himself, but of someone else. I feel so humbled and blessed today.Have a wonderfully meaningful Easter~Alicia
What a beautiful and touching post. Thank you for sharing your story of pain, love and forgiveness.I wish you amazing blessings in your journey ahead!Warmly,Debbykay at Rose Cottage Gardens and Farm
Thank you for sharing your story on Good Friday. What a wonderful way to demonstrate Christ’s love and forgiveness. I pray that all who read will be touched by that same love.Easter blessings to you, dear Laura.Lorrie
You have a very touching story, and a powerful testimony!!!Happy Easter to you. 🙂
Thanks for sharing that with me..and I am glad we are getting to know each other 🙂 One day I will share mine..maybe in an email..:)
I am so happy you shared this story. You are truly blessed and its wonderful that you realize it.I love your blog!<>~Really Rainey~<>
Oh, Laura, i rejoice with you!! We serve a mighty God. With Tears of joy I say, “Hallelujah!”… thank you for sharing your testimony… I am amazed, over and over, how there is nothing impossible with the Lord, and how He loves us so much as to make “beauty for our ashes…” Blessings to you as you celebrate the most wonderful gift- that of salvation through Jesus. We serve a RISEN Lord!!! Amen.
I have been waiting and praying for you and your post today. If it’s ok I would like to link your post to mine so people that maybe haven’t been as blessed as I have to meet you can hear these words of encouragement and trully what Easter is about..rebirth. Thank you again Laura for sharing. Now I am thinking on how I can make Easter real to my kids @ this special time of the year.Blessings and Happy Easter.Roxanne
You have such a way with words and your story is so touching. Thank you for sharing it with all of us 🙂All the best,Allison
What a wonderful testimony! Thank you for sharing it. May the Lord bless you and cause His face to shine down upon you!
What a beautiful post. Jesus is so faithful, so good to us. Thank you for sharing your story.
Thank you Laura for sharing this story of hope, love and forgiveness today. May God continue to bless you and your family. Nalley and I wish you all a blessed Easter. Harriet sends puppy dog kisses to Rudi!
Having just come from Good Friday Services at our Church, this brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing and may you have a Happy Easter.
Oh Laura, you made me cry! This was such an incredibly beautiful post. Thank you so much for sharing it. I hope that you have a WONDERFUL Easter.*hugs*
Thank you for your incredible words and willingness to share. Jesus says that you are fearfully and wonderfully made, for with Him all things are possible.You have a purpose, perhaps the fact that you helped so many people today, on Good Friday helps you fulfill that purpose. Be blessed always,Puna
Thank you for sharing your very personal and touching story. I too am a believer and know of what you speak. I’m sure your life is comforting to so many. Have a very blessed Easter!
Isn’t it amazing that no matter how ugly we are He still loves us?
Oh Sweet One thank you for sharing your heart and your precious life. God has so obviously had His hand on you from the begining. Your hurts and trials have turned out to be a beautiful story of God’s love, grace and new beginings…Blessings~Robin Rane’All Things Heart and Home
Thank you for sharing your story Laura. I knew your childhood was troubled, but had no idea the extent of it. You are truly brave and I admire you becoming the woman you are now…. beautiful inside AND out. I hope you and your family have a blessed Easter.(((hugs)))rue
What a beautiful story of Faith and perseverance. Thank you so much for sharing this.Have a wonderful Easter!Lou Cinda 🙂
What a lovely and hopeful message!
A truly inspiring post. I am so touched..A glorious Easter to you..God bless you for caring for your grandfather, rising above the normal feelings you had, and doing His work..
What a beautiful post! Thank you for sharing your personal witness. You touched me and I am sure you touched many others. Have a blessed Easter!
Hi Laura…what a beautiful testimony! It brought to mind one of my favorite hymns…“Amazing grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me. I once was lost but now am found, was blind but now I see….”I wish you a blessed Easter…and thank you for stopping by and for your kind comment!;-D
Absolutely beautiful. I always try and remember: with repentance, it doesn’t matter where we’ve been or where we are. What matters is which direction you’re moving.
Laura,May you have a blessed Easter on Resurrection Sunday as you celebrate the RISEN LORD!This is the first time that I have visited your blog. I’d like t return in the future.God Bless you real good!Deanna from the Kansas Flinthills
hey there sweets,beautiful post!!! Happy Easter!oxoxox,jessi
Oh, Dear One, thank you so much for sharing your heart today! I’m sorry for all the hurt that has been in your life. I too know Jesus as my Savior and I know He can turn everything around for us! He gives us the hope and the reason to go. You have a purpose in this life and He is using you today!Laura, I wish you and your family a very special blessed Easter.Be a sweetie,Shelia 😉
Beautiful post. Happy Easter to you!
Such an amazing post! Very inspiring and I appreciate you sharing that.
Thank you- awesome post. I am so glad your story has such a happy ending! We are not of this world. (Thank goodness!) Have a wonderful Easter. Thanks for posting on my blog, today.
God Bless you Laura for opening up your heart and sharing this with us. It touches me greatly as I have chosen to help some of God’s little lambs and currently have 3 foster children! These delightful little people had no choice in what led to where they are today. With my entire being, I want them to know that no matter what, they are loved by a God that KEEPS HIS PROMISES. A God that will walk with them every day and loves them unconditionally and will never choose anything over them. It sadden’s me that your experience in foster care was painful and also reinforces to me that what I am doing is very important. (regardless of how fruitless it can sometimes feel) Drugs are instruments of the devil and most of the children I end up with have been the victims of their evil consequences. I don’t know if you have seen the video of my adorable little chef Madison on my blog, but she is a gift from God to our family and we adopted her out of foster care. I also did a slide show to celebrate her adoption that can be found on youtube.com if you search on “The Gift of Madison” She is a joy to me everyday and I thank God for bringing her to us! Know you are a daughter of the King Most High and above even the angels! Happy Easter Daughter of the King Most High! Karyn
Hi Laura,It is wonderful to hear how Christ has changed your life. He is the answer that so many people are looking for. Thanks for sharing your testimony.Shannon
What a beautiful retelling of God’s redemption. Thank you for sharing it. God will use it and bless you for sharing it.Happy Easter, Laura!
I actually don’t quite know what to say except for thanking you for sharing this. Your testimony is incredibly moving. I pray that you continue to feel healed and whole. God Bless you.Have a great Easter with your loved ones.
Thanks so much for your lovely comment on my blog !Your is SO adorable !I love the colours, it is so soft and cute !I add your link on my blog I will come back very soon !Valerie, Belgium
Dear Miz Laura,Thank you for sharing your story, you never how many people you touch by sharing. You’ve certainly touched me and I thank you for your truth and honesty. Many blessings to you.
Laura, what a very sweet & thoughtful post to share with everyone. I'm so sorry for what you had to go through. I'm one of those who grew up in a wonderful home & took that for granted for a long time, but I know it wasn't that way for everyone. I'm so glad you met Jesus, the most precious one we could ever get to know personally. Blessings this Easter!
Happy Easter!!!Beautiful post!!! Bendiciones
Laura, your story is amazing. How wonderful that Christ came to you to show you the direction that your life should follow. Just hold our your hands and He will take you and guide you. Lovely, lovely post. An incredible story. I had a drug addict cousin who became clean and sober, got involved in a church and then was killed in a car wreck on the way to a church college where he was going to attend. Both he and his wife were killed. Both Christians and recovered substance abusers. I guess God wanted him right then and there. Have a lovely, lovely Easter!Blessings,Becky
Thank you for sharing your testimony and how God’s amazing grace saved you. I pray that anyone reading this blog who is not a believer will come to realize the amzing peace and grace that is available to them through Jesus! Happy Easter!
Such a wonderful testimony! Thank you for sharing so much of your life! I pray that everyone that reads this is touched. Happy Easter!!~Liz
Oh Laura you are such a blessing! Thank you for sharing your relationship with Jesus. What an encouragement to me! Praise our Lord! Bless you precious Laura!Sue
Thanks for sharing your story. I’m glad to hear that you have come out stronger with the help of Christ. You are right, we are not alone. You have turned into a beautiful person. Don’t ever forget that!
Thank you for this wonderful, personal testimony of God’s love and its power to sustain each one who trusts in Him.
Laura, thank you for sharing a little of your background with us and being a wonderful Christian testimony. God bless you and yours this Easter.
God bless you Laura. I didn’t know that you grew up in Foster care. Did you ever read my post on adoption? James and I are nearing the end of the tedious paperwork process to adopt from the FC system in Arkansas! We are SO excited! As much as I would like to give them all a home, we will help as many as we can.
What a beautiful post–it really touched me. Thanks for being so honest and open and sharing your inspirational story with us. Happy Easter to you and yours! 🙂
Beautiful testimony! Thank you so much for sharing your blog and your story with me. Blessings this Easter!
What a marvelous testimony. I’m so glad you chose to share it with us on Spiritual Sundays. The Savior always amazes me how he works in the hearts of believers. I know your testimony will give hope to a lot of people.Charlotte
Laura, I too need a tissue now!Beautiful, beautiful heartfelt post.Just look at the woman you have become! I wish for that same faith and strength to shine through in all children.A Happy Easter to you and yours~Hugs, Nikki
Hello Laura,Thank you for sharing your testimony. Jesus is the Way, the Truth, and the Life. He’s there for you and me. I’m glad you know Him, as do I! I pray you have a Happy and Blessed Easter.Blessings,Sandi
Thank you fort your sweet comment on my blog, I love how you opened your heart on this post.
I read your post a couple of hours ago. It has taken me this long to think of how to respond without sounding contrite, although I am sure I still will. I think we all carry our story with us throughout our lives. I, for one, try not to be defined by my past and take responsibility for my decisions and for my future.Thank you Laura for sharing your story with us and making us all realize that we can decide who we chose to be. Yes, you have made some choices that at the time seemed to be not the best decisions, but they all made you into the courageous woman you are today. I would never call any of them mistakes because I certainly think you are fantastic.Happy Easter, Laura.Love,Brooke
Thank you for sharing this awesome testimony. God is so wonderful so full of love which He willingly and lovingly pour out on us-long before we even know He is there.Blessings this Ressurrection Sunday.Not AloneWillnette
Laura,This is one of the most poignant testimonies that I have ever read!! I am so touched !! Thank you for sharing.Wishing you and your family a most blessed and joyous Happy Resurrection Sunday.
Thank you for sharing from your life and your heart. Many lives have been and will be touched by your words.
Laura, what an amazing post! I wish I could reach through the computer screen right now and give you a big hug. God really is there for us, and Jesus’ sacrifice awes me to pieces. I’m so glad that He has you wrapped up in his arms of love, too! Sending you much love and many good wishes on Easter and always…XO,Sheila (who admires the woman you are!) 🙂
Thank you for this post. I can relate to your story in so many ways. This really touched me, thank you for being so open.
I enjoyed visiting your blog today. I can’t imagine having such a hard life but I do know what it feels like to know that I am loved by a Heavenly Father. Thanks for visiting my blog through Julia !Hooked on Houses.
What a beautiful testimony you’ve posted, Laura. Jesus truly is the source of all good and happiness. Thank you for your honesty – I imagine it will have an impact on many people who read it.Happy Easter…Kathy
LaurelThis post has touchd me like no other. I went away not able to comment, but am back to let you know that I admire how brave you are to share with all of us, the vulnerabilities in your life storey.A tear, hug and smileThank you for this,God bless you,Darlene
Thanks for sharing. Happy Spiritual Sunday. I wish you a Blessed Easter as you celebrate our risen Lord.
What a powerful testimony to share. I think that this can minister to so many, the testiment of faith. We are all sinners, but it is up to us to share the word of his glory, our forgiving father, my redeemer. I love this post! Thank you for sharing your words.I am blessed. Thank you for your bloggy friendship. It warms my spirit.Happy Easter!
WOW! What a strong woman you are. I can tell that the Lord is in your life, with your writing I can just see how you glow with his love. I’m sure that your testimony will guide others closer to God. Words can not express how delighted I am that you chose to post this on Spiritual Sundays.God Bless you,Ginger
Thank you Laura. Wishing you a most Joyous Easter!Many Blessings, Doreen
You are a joy and inspiration to me just by knowing you through your blog. Hopping we’ll meet in person one day. Wishing you Happy Easter to you and your FamilyBlessings,Efrat Dalton
Laura, thank you for sharing post. In my early teen years I too was ready to “write myself off” my father was physically and emotionally abusive. A voice told me one day that by taking this course of action, I would be the one too suffer the most as “life would go one without me.” God must have drilled this into my head, as my father died of a brain tumor when I was 15 and I became “free to live” so to speak. I married at 21 to my dear husband(25 yrs this year)have 3 wonderful kids, and becoming a grandmother in August. All this I would NOT have had had I let my emotions take control. I have told them my story and that I have never forgot my dark days or the voice I heard. God is awsome and we are in control of our own destiny. It looks like you Laura have blossomed into a wonderful lady and I hope your life is enriched with as much love, peace and kindness as mine. Sorry for such a long comment but your post really touched me. Have a blessed Easter.
Hi, Laura!My how the power of Jesus can turn one life around! Many will see and hear and He will be glorified today. Thank you, my courageous sister, for sharing our Saviour.I’m finding your blogsite so very interesting and beautiful. I appreciate your visit today and I extend open arms to you at anytime you choose to stop by. You will always be welcome.
Laura,I am so glad that Jesus was there for you when you needed Him and letting you know that He was with you always. God Bless you and have a very Blessed Easter.~Jean
Laura, Thank you. I just received a letter from a 20 year old in prison with a story so similar to yours, who is reading the Bible for the first time and wanting to know God. Your testimony gives hope to so many. We have a HOPE!God bless you.
What a beautiful story you have shared. It’s most inspiring and soulful. Angels around you.Happy Twirls
Thank you Laura! 🙂You are a blessing!Monica
Happy Easter to someone who knows the power of the Atonement of our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ! Thank you for sharing. So sorry to hear of the hurt and pain you have had to endure…may you have as full a joy as the the pain was deep that you have suffered.Loving thoughts, ~TattingChic 🙂
Thank you Laura, for sharing your story with us.I admire how brave and how strong you must have been to get through this.Wishing you and your family a very happy and blessed Easter and wonderful days ahead.HugsCarolyn
This was a beautiful post, and it brought tears to my eyes. So much for a child to endure, and how amazing that you have become who you are today! God indeed works in mysterious ways, and that has definitely happened in your life. I am so impressed that you had every right to feel bitterness toward your grandfather and yet, you triumphed over that. What a miracle you are, and how wonderful that you shared this. Thank you for a most meaningful post. laurie
Laura,Your beautiful testimony moves my heart. I am so glad we came to know each other through this blogging community! I hope that you and your family had a very wonderful Easter weekend!
No wonder you create such beauty outside…you are gorgeous inside!Blessed Easter!m ^..^
What a powerful testimony. Thank you for sharing it with us. And thank you for stopping by my blog on Spiritual Sunday!Jillian
What a beautiful spirit you have, thank you for sharing your story. Life comes at us no matter what and we are in it for the journey, and when you are a child you are only along for the ride, now as an adult you are driving…….Blessings,Margaret B
Hi, Laura,I was reading down through some of your posts and found this one. Whew, you have not had an easy road, but I am so happy for you that it has lead you to Christ. I am so grateful to have found Him myself. I love and need Him so much. I guess all my weaknesses and challenges have been a blessings, because they have brought home to me the absolute need for dependence upon the Savior. He is my source of strength and light. I don’t know how I would get through this life, with all its disappointments and insecurities, without having our Rock and our Salvation there for me, too.Thank you for your wonderful testimony and I hope you had a blessed Easter!Elizabeth
Beautiful post, Laura…very inspiring. You were and are very brave to have overcome so much! Thanks for sharing…love to you,
Susan
Laura ~ You have a wonderful testimony, and one with a few similarities to my own. A violent and painful childhood that might have justified a life of bitterness, anger and resentment, but lead me to the cross instead. I married the pastor’s eldest son 35 years ago, accepting Jesus as my Saviour several weeks after we were married when I turned 18. I know that I had felt the protective hand of God on my life even before I knew it was Him that watched over me during those bad years.
While life is never easy, and frequently messy, the worst was over for me at 18 when I married Tim, and I am thankful every day for my Salvation and restoration to a whole, healthy life.
Blessings ~ Eileen @ Star’s Fault
That was the BEST Easter post- out of ll the many that I read…Love, Kass
Your writing is the true testament of what Easter should mean.
God Bless,
Maureen
Laura, that is so powerful.. You are inspiring.. Many blessing to you..
From one Laura to another,
thank you.
Wow! This is powerful! Thank you so much for sharing. You have overcome such obstacles and are the better for it. I have fallen behind in blog reading, but I am so glad to be catching up on yours. Glad I went back far enough to read this one.
What a beautiful, beautiful entry.
God bless you!
Dear Laura,
I've only recently found you so I had no idea.
You're the true testimony of what Prophet Isaiah said:
” “Can a mother forget the baby at her breast
and have no compassion on the child she has borne?
Though she may forget,
I will not forget you!
16 See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;
your walls are ever before me. “
now I know you vacum in your Pearls because you're wearing them where it matters most – your heart.
Blessings your way Sweet Lady,
Teresa
P.S. After Lent and Holly Week – and after a wonderful Easter Lunch with Dear Hubby and Dear Kids – I all of the sudden felt “empty”. It was like something was missing now that My Lord Had Risen and after doing a run through my friends' blogs I decided to drop by and sent you a touchbase “take care/Happy Easter” note and all of the sudden I stopped feeling alone and purposeless. Love, T